Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Hunt of the Marshmallow

Ahhh, the unassuming marshmallow. Silent in its pillowy sweetness, it sits on a table, happy with the world. This peaceful kitchen scene is one that can be witnessed across the vast lands of human existence. Peaceful, yes. But for how long?

As feared, the peaceful life of the marshmallow is not part of the great circle of life. The human species is a grave predator. At times unrelenting, they have an inexplicabe hunger for melty sweetness. It wasn't so bad at first...

The humans stole the marshmallows from their natural habitats, but simply to observe. They were put through rigorous tests of strength and endurance. It appeared that the humans were looking for a new pet, or possibly a feature exhibit for the zoos across the world.

Some marshmallows even liked the idea. They were tired of the wilds. The idea of being put up in a human household and waited on hand a foot seemed like a blessing. No longer did they forage for glucose to amass their bodies. The humans hooked them up to sugar machines. Domesticated marshmallows grew fat and lazy, but they appeared to be happy.

It didn't take long for the humans to expose themselves for the cruel beings they truly were. They snarled their sweet-toothed cries of attack and hunted those who ran. What had once been a quick and resilient people, had been turned into a bunch of sarcoidosis ridden lumps of grotesqueness. They could barely run for their lives. But a choice few survived...

They met in secret, under tables, in dark corners. They were burned and beaten, but they were alive. They formed an elite league of marshmallows to battle the threat of human kind. There were unknown amounts of marshmallows still in captivity, being fattened for the slaughter. Marshmallow hunters were constantly seeking wild varieties of sweet sticky goodness.

Members of the elite league sacrificed their pure whiteness for camouflage, jumping through fire, and burning their flesh into thick carbon armor. They vowed to fight for al marshmallows until the siege of human kind extinguished. They called themselves: Ninjamallows.